Time To Make A Difference

I learned in my Psychology class a few months ago about the different interests and mentalities of certain age groups. One mentality of an early college student is a desire to find a place in the world and have an impact on it. Though we may now simply label it as "natural" and therefore typical of a college student to have those desires, I can't help but wonder if this is not also something that was intentionally placed in the heart of man by our Heavenly Father. Psychology calls it a developmental phase, I call it a preparation by God. Let me first make a comparison.

Though also subject to opinion, I also find the rapid development of children to not only be biological, but spiritual. We are taught that the Holy Ghost is the teacher of all truth. Therefore, of course when our teachers in 2nd grade taught us that 2+2=4, the Holy Ghost would confirm the truthfulness of that logic. I believe the Holy Ghost can confirm many of those same sorts of topics. However, the difference with children is their spiritual purity. The Holy Ghost has no trouble filling the hearts and souls of those beautiful pure and innocent children so much so that it may testify at will and the child will receive the witness just as the messenger delivered it. How I wish that I could be as a child and remain so pure that the Holy Ghost could speak to me so! This example shows how the spiritual development and biological development of a human can cooperate through life periods.

Prepared with an active mind and full of eagerness for new experiences, the young adult mind is primed for instructions from the Lord. A college student is looking for their place, their mark, their opportunity to make history. What a great time for the Lord to send forth his specific calls to His children so that they might properly prepare themselves for the world to come. How those calls come or how to know that the Lord has spoken to you in such a manner I wish I knew. Being a college student myself, I can't say I've had personal experience enough yet to know what the whole stage is like. What I do know though is that my heart is open and my spirit willing.

I would not be surprised if the Lord has prepared the development of our persons to fit the biological/spiritual patterns necessary to make our lives completely in sync. I am anxious to see in my future life how my biological preparation prepares me for spiritual callings. One such stage that comes to mind is the wisdom associated with the older generations. Such wisdom must be well developed for callings prepared by the Lord for those He can trust to lead and perform great works. I personally would feel much more comfortable speaking with an experienced and learned Bishop than one that was not. I thank the Lord for His careful preparation and design for this wonderful existence. I know I can trust Him completely.

Label Me Not

It's been awhile since I've been here to write down some thoughts, but such is life, always drawing us this way and that. Just because I've been busy though, I still continue my pondering over many unnoticed things that each of us participate in every day.

An American Master Pieces class and a psychology class both contributed to this thought and conclusion over the past 2-3 months. Apologies for the lack of sources, but a great author in early American history wrote a very powerful piece asking his audience to avoid labels. Psychology class talked about the stereotyping ability of labeling and the adverse affects it can have on someones self perception. I certainly relate to these claims as I quickly search through my memory and recall comments made by others who will say that I'm shy or quiet and therefore perceive myself as such and label myself as such for the rest of my life. However, the extension of labeling goes so much further than I realized.

The American author can be best attributed to the thought that labeling even exists among some of the things we do and choices we've made. The greatest example of this is our occupations. When we walk into a hospital we see the doctors and the nurses and therefore label them as such and mental distinguish them with the average qualities that every doctor or nurse should have in our minds. This occurs for every profession, police officer, farmer, president, etc. The fact that we stereotype each of these individuals is not even the whole of the issue I'm coming to however. Its how concrete we accept these labels ourselves is what I ponder about. Will a farmer always think as a farmer? Will he, simply because he's taken on such an occupation, act like most farmers do just because "thats what farmers do"?

Further pondering takes me to consider the limitation a label could impose on an individual simple because of how strongly they relate to it. Will a farmer for example, be less likely or willing to assist in a medical situation simply because they've taken upon themselves their new life of farmer? I wonder if a doctor would be less likely to chop wood or wash the dishes by hand simply because thats not what a doctor would normally be found doing? Then we must think about certain hobbies, opinions, and even political views that each of these individuals might take simply because thats what people of their profession generally accept as correct. I do personally believe that there may be opportunities, beliefs, or doings that we may avoid in life simply because that's not "us", or, in other words, thats not who we've been labeled to be.

The solution? Just as I've mentioned in the title, we reject the labels. No longer is that man growing corn a farmer, but he's a man that grows corn to provide for his family. A doctor is a man that enjoys helping others and takes time out of his day to help heal the wounds of those around of him. These are the things that they chose to do every day, not something that they have been cemented in. I am someone that loves learning about the brain. So i hope one day to learn enough about the brain that I can help people with neurological problems. But that is something that I will do and I will do it because I chose to do so. Along with helping those with neurological problems i will choose to fence, to read, to marry, to do many many things because my life will continue to be active and different, ever increasing. Avoid the stationing of labels. Avoid their ability to limit what you THINK your possibilities are. You are not the doctor, you are someone who chose to heal. In fact, the only label we can truly accept is that we are sons and daughters of God. That is the only permanent label that will allow for all of our possibilities to still be realized. And so here I am world, Andrew Berrett, one of the children of God who seeks to chose a wonderful life.

Which World Are You In?

Here's a thought for the thinkers: How many worlds do we enter into every day? Defining a the specific meaning of world that I'm referring to, I mean "world" as in the view, surroundings, and influence that a person experiences around them at any given moment. As I sit in a college campus library right now my "world" is limited by a few walls and I personally have restricted it just a little farther by wearing headphones so that I am cut off to the audible effects around me, at least to a certain point. The student sitting across from me, whom I know nothing about, is sharing this world with me right now and is experiencing many of the same elements, minus the music and the direction in which he is viewing the things around of him. The other 30 or so students in this room all each have their own worlds in which they are currently a part of. These worlds are all unique and are only available to one person at a time. Though we may be involved in an activity with someone, there is always still a slight variance in the experience and surroundings. So here I'll repeat my question again. How many times in the day do we enter into a new world?

When I get up from this table and begin to walk back to my car I can count right now off the top of my head that I will enter into and leave at least 25 different worlds, different places or environments with different circumstances and different views. As I walk simply through this floor to the stairs I will find a number of these worlds. This I can use as example.

1) The world in which I am now situated which involves sitting in a room full of tables and chairs and surrounded by books. Bookshelves line the perimeter of the room and I can see many students surrounding me.

2) When I begin to leave I enter into the world adjacent to this. In that world there will be a check out desk and a small set of public computers with students busily working on homework. I will be a new entry into that world and will therefore be the cause for bringing a change to the environment or surroundings. Someone will look up and see me and therefore bring about an established effect of my being in the perspective of that student.

3) Once passing that area I will enter into one more world before I head down the stairs. That world will be similar to the one I am in now because there are students also studying at tables and many are also surrounded by bookshelves. That world will differ however in the frequent passing of students entering and leaving the 5th floor of the library. Again I will pass through that world full of perspectives of the 20-30 students that study there. I will for a moment be a part of their recognition and therefore have a momentary place. Quickly though I will be out of that world and on into the new world of the staircase which itself has multiple worlds as you proceed down the multiple levels.

This sounds a little crazy I know, but pondering on it makes the mind wonder how fascinating it would be to acquire or even just experience all of the various perspectives and "worlds" that we all live in. We are all intertwined, and therefore these worlds must overlap to an extend, but at the same time, with or without overlap, we are all still unique in what we have to see or to experience in our environment.

Take this one step farther. What kind of world forms when we then enter into different actions? Though I may be sitting here for the next hour.. two hours, whatever that time may be, what if a friend were to come and sit across from me and begin talking to me? Obviously I would listen and focus my attention on that individual. My world shrinks, it redefines, it changes. For this new action of socializing, I just had to enter a whole new world. I had to enter a world in which I still exist in the same surroundings, but the effect of the surroundings on me have been dampened. I focus so much more on the speaker that I no longer notice the pretty girl to my right or the creative project being worked on to my left. Just the change in activity has changed the way that I view the world I am in and has brought about the existence of a new one. What kind of world shows up when a foe assaults me? I'm not in the same world I was in before when my defensive actions begin. My world has been once again shrunk to the point of seeing and experiencing an environment with only one person. There is only overlap between me and my foe. No one else is involved, no one else is of any matter, I must focus and respond accordingly to this one individual. That is a very small world until an outsider comes in and breaks the concentration, disrupting the cause, the place of the new world.

I challenge anyone to try and count the number of different worlds they experience in a day, whether they be places or focuses. I've tried but I quickly lost count. I'll rephrase that, I didn't lose count, I couldn't count fast enough to keep up. This is a very general wondering, but I am curious if any sort of social or psychological diseases are related to this view at all? Are there people in the world that can't associate their world with another? Are there people who don't see the worlds of other individuals and therefore believe that the only world is their own which is only one continuous world? Could it be possible to completely lose this perspective so that there is a complete loss of wide view? Due to the social disorder of Asperger's Syndrome being present in my family, I learned that part of the effects of such a syndrome is the inability for an individual to understand or see the perspective of another, or put more simply, to relate with others and/or interpret others feelings. Is this related? Is there a world gap? I know this is not an explanation for it all but I've pondered what it must be like to have such symptoms. Is there really a restriction to a single world? Or is there simply no interaction between their own world and the worlds of others? Maybe there are plenty of personal world changes but no interactions of worlds between them and other people.

I question: How far is it possible to integrate your own world into the world of another? A personal experience might be my twin brother and I. There must have been multiple times while we grew together that our worlds were very similar and therefore learned much of the same things and thus have always related well. What about beyond that? How far is it possible to bring someone into your own world? I don't think I can answer that question because there may be no way to know if two individuals are truly experiencing the same things. But does God have access to all of these worlds? Does the Holy Ghost see it all that we might be able to receive the greatest help and the greatest revelation? Is this an element of the Omnipresence of God? Again I cannot answer my own questions but I ponder deeply on the ability that God may have to be incorporated in each of our own various and changing worlds. I would not be surprised if quite simply our many "worlds" are but a part of His great view and it all is viewable in an instant. I will not be able to answer that until the time comes that I meet the Maker Himself.

I close with the question that I titled this blog with: "What World Are You In?" and now I extend that question with "What world will you be in in thirty minutes? three hours? tomorrow?" I can assure you that you will begin to see many different worlds around you for there are many people and many environments. This does well to prove that no two days are ever the same. This may go as far as to specify that comment farther by saying no two thirty-minutes are the same. You may ponder yourself how much more specific that could be. I'd like to close this with a personal recommendation. We seem to have a choice on our own who we narrow our worlds around or who we are willing to invite into our worlds for any given moment. I believe God would wish that we had him a part of every one of our worlds, every one of our experiences and environments. No matter how far that world narrows down to, even to the point of defense from a foe, God must always be in that world. When He is in every one of our worlds, He is always there to be an influence. Of all the people we can invite to be a part of our ever day, He should be the first. May that be the intended conclusion to this blog. It's been a thought provoking exploration, but the ultimate realization I've had from this is just how involved God really can be in our lives and just how much control we COULD have but many of us do not use. Explore those thoughts on your own.

Mission Miracles

Well im just on a roll with these blogs lately huh? I guess I've just had a lot to think about lately. A few things during the past week have come to my mind that seemed to have been forgotten for a short while but thankfully, and I'm not sure why, I finally brought the memories back. One of those is a miracle that occured on my mission that I wanted to go ahead and share publicly as a testimony of the marvelous workings of God. Yes this is a miracle so all that read this should understand and treat it as such. But I feel that it is more on the degree of an awe to the power of God rather than an experience that needs to be held private. And so I feel it completely appropriate to share it. It's a longer story so I apologize for the lengthy story but believe me its worth it and it is very true.

As background I'll start with saying that this all occured in a city called Fort Wayne, Indiana. It's the second largest city it Indiana and so for that case the area we covered had a lot of people in it. We had responsibility of carrying the gospel to about 100,000 people or so. This statistic adds to the incredible nature of the miracle so that is why I am sharing it. Quite frequently my companion, Elder Michie (pronounced Mickey) and I would work in some of the more sketchy parts of the city simply because we had so many referrals down there and while there we would find more people to teach. One of those people that we taught in the Fort Wayne ghetto was a girl who called herself J. She lived with her mom who, following the family standard, called herself B. That made it easy for us to remember believe me. J was an awesome girl, she had little religious background and really at first had no interest or care in it. She was turned off by other pastors and preachers who had repeatedly told her that she just needed to repent and that the questions that she had would be answered in time, she just had to wait. No matter how much she pleaded of these church leaders to answer her questions (which were quite simple I have to say) they turned her away and told her to figure it out herself. And so she didn't trust pretty much all church officials. When we approached her and began answering her questions right on the spot, she was impressed and began to absorb it all in. It quickly turned into an investigation and we were teaching her quite frequently. Her mother B was much less interested simply for the fact that she cared more for the partying and drinking than much else at the time. She didn't really want to get into anything big. So we kept on with J and taught her as regularly as possible.

One day when we came to visit J she was not at all herself. It didn't take long before she confessed what hat happened quite recently. Her mom B had a boyfriend that she'd been dating for a reasonable amount of time and they had began to all become really close at least as friends. The boyfriend (we'll call him G for sake of keeping the awesome name selection going) G was headed to work one day when he decided to stop by to see B. He said that he couldn't stay very long since he was headed to work but quite out of the blue he began to bear his testimony to B and J. Both of them were quite surprised because they didn't know G even had a faith, let alone went to church. Well, he outright testified to them that he knew God was real and that they needed to figure that out too as soon as possible. He left on that note with B and J still trying to figure out why the sudden testimony. It wasn't long before they found out. G worked at some sort of construction facility in outer Fort Wayne that had a lot of heavy machinery and other heavy duty things. G was on the ground working on something while a partner was in a backhoe of some sort lifting some objects into place. While in this work, the backhoe lost grip of its holding and dropped it all to the ground. Underneath the dropped cargo was G. He had unfortunately been in the wrong place in the wrong time. It's obvious that G did not plan this in any way, but for some reason, he had been killed on the same day that he had offered his first and last testimony of the Father. When B and J heard about this they were obviously very distraught and very sad, B even had a bit of depression going on for a little while, but they felt blessed to have been the listeners and recipients to G's last testimony. They committed to living a much more righteous lifestyle and doing exactly what G said, find God. Now you may think that this would be a good ending to the story, but it gets better.

A little less than a week after the incident that killed G, Elder Michie and I were found again driving through Fort Wayne after being cancelled on again for an appointment. Our back up plans had failed quickly behind the appointment and we were left to use our creativity and imagination on what to do next. Knowing the city quite well by that point I told Elder Michie that we might as well just do some light tracting until our next appointment that would be only about an hour away. So we headed to a completely random street that I pointed to and went with the intention on talking to the first person we could see. We parked the car and began walking the street with our eyes wide open. Surprising to me was to see that the first person we saw was a 19-20 year old guy out watering his front yard plants. It was surprising because he seemed to be doing it for the fun of it and I don't know about you but I don't know very many 19-20 year old ambitious gardeners haha. But, we approached him and inquired of him what his faith was. He said he was Muslim and had no Christian ties and so he wouldnt be interested. Well, being the persistent missionaries that we were I asked him if he could teach us then a little about his faith and then maybe we could find out how our faiths related. We had a good short discussion on this and then the young man made the comment "Well I'm not the person that knows a lot about my faith in my family though. My dad is much more into it" And so we quickly inquired if we could meet his dad. What he said then stunned us. He said "Well, now might not be the best time to talk to him. He just went through a very hard time. He works at a construction yard and there was an accident recently in which my dad was carrying a load in his machine and it accidently fell on a guy and killed him. My dad is way depressed about it" My companion and I looked at each other with very wide eyes of amazement. Was this the same guy that had accidently killed G??? I quickly demanded of the young man that he get is dad so we could talk to him. He reluctantly complied and his dad also was very reluctant to come out to speak with us. We promised him as he came out that he would not be disappointed about what he was about to hear. I told him that we knew exactly what had happened at his work the other day and that we wanted to tell him the great blessing that had happened from it. Keep in mind that this man was extremely depressed, to the point in which I thought he might have taken his own life had he enough guts to convince himself of it. His personal guilt level was extremely obvious. I rehearsed to the man the story of B and J and what had happened the morning before G had gone to work. I told him that because of all that had happened that day, B and J were more faithful to God than they had ever been in their entire lives. I continued to say that although we may not have the same beliefs about God or diety or the purpose of life, the miracle is still the same and either way, these two people are now brought closer to God. Truly God works in mysterious ways to save His own children. It seemed like this conversation gave that man much to ponder on but it was obvious he was still not completely comforted by it. I don't blame him at all, but I think there was finally some flicker of hope added back into his heart. His life may have been saved that day from depression and whatever act he may have done in his remorse.

Let's consider the chances of this happening. What are the chances that we happened to know B and J in this trying point in their lives? What's the chance that we happened to come by at the right time to find out about this event and J trusting us enough to tell us about it? What are the chances that in a few days our appointments just happened to fall through so that we'd have to make the choice to go tracting somewhere? What are the chances that we happened to pick that one street on that certain day when that certain man would be home and that his son would be first person we tracted into? What are the chances that we would know exactly what to say so that we'd be able to get to meet that boys dad and offer that comfort? In a city of hundreds of thousands of people, I'd say that all of these chances are extremely slim, down to the point of being practically zero. I feel blessed myself to have been used by the Lord in this way and to have been even just trusted the Lord for a task like that. I wish I knew what happened to that man but I will simply trust that if God could get my companion and I there like that, he could certainly take care of that man the rest of the way too. Never underestimate the abilities of God.

Why Neuroscience

I have this dream... and that's kind of why I'm at school right now... that dream is to be a Neurologist. One day, I may even enter into Neuroresearch. Why? I'll tell you why.

When I was in my senior year in highschool, near the beginning of the year, I was accepted into a highschool medical internship that took place at the local hospital. It was a great experience and I feel very fortunate that I was allowed to participate in such a program. We shadowed as many various positions as we could and I really got around to a lot of different ones. I at one time signed up to go see the "EEG unit" or so I though that was what it was called. Come to find out, an EEG was just a device used by the Neuroscience department of the hospital. I finally found my way to the place I needed to be and was greeted and taken by a Gail Phillips, one of the Neurologists at the hospital. She quickly apologized for the fact that there were no scheduled surgeries at the time and so we'd just have to sit and talk for a little while. (I had no idea I was getting into any surgeries that day anyway so I wasn't sure if I was supposed to be disappointed or not). The entire time was taken up by our conversation, a total of 4 hours. She decided to give me a brief overview of neuroscience and then help me find some good neuroscience schools and then she began to show me what passion was driving her. I can now understand why that field is so important. This has now become my passion. Let me explain:

I can only explain the brains functions in the most general and uneducated terms right now because, well, im still uneducated about it all. But I'll still do my best to make sense and sound reasonable. When you have a pain in your leg, or finger, or wherever in your body, is the pain you feel truly in that part of the body? Surprisingly no. The injury is there, but signals from the nerves in the area send signals first to the brain which it processes and then tells you that you are experiencing pain in that certain location. Every feeling or pain, every smell or taste, all of these things first have to go through the brain to be translated. This is one of the thousands of reasons that the brain is so important. With the nerves after nerves after nerves going through our bodies, there is little that our brains miss, especially the things internally that we may not be able to "feel" but the brain will still recognize subconsciously.

The idea that Gail shared with me is the hope of all Neurologists. It would be the answer to all diagnosis' if there could be a way found to "ask" the brain what was wrong with the body. If the brain is truly connected to all of the systems and in control of the subconscious actions of the body, then there must be a way to take advantage of that connection. If say there were an odd pain in the stomach region that doctors could not explain, a neurologist would "ask" the brain by finding out what signals its triggering to send what chemicals down to the stomach area to fix the problem. If we know what the brain is trying to do for the body, we may be able to also know what to do to help. If there are things "short circuiting" then we'd also be able to tell in the body that something is not receiving the proper signals. So, in general, we want to know what the brain knows so that we can help the brain do what it needs to do. There are many theories for asking the brain these questions but many are very much debated, especially by those who are afraid of the evil in the world and the opportunity to abuse the possible technology.

Gail supported the idea of developing a probe that could be placed on a brain to receive a constant flow of nervous signals. Essentially were that to happen, ever person could even check their own signals from their own computers. A doctors visit would mean logging onto the computer, sending in your code/frequency, and your doctor pulling up the information on his computer. From the various waves given from different parts of body and different functions operating, the doctor would be able to see which waves are off and whatnot and diagnose straight from the computer. I imagine there's no way real doctor visits would go obsolete but there would be much less needed due to the convenience of the new probes. The obvious scare with this is the wonder of what people could do with the probes, are they dangerous? Could people tap into them? We dont know, but the plusses for this method are immense. I'm not sure how I stand on that as of yet, but the idea of being able to diagnose for troubles through the means of asking the brain seems fascinating to me.

Neuroscience has a long way to go still. There is so much that will be and can be learned in this field. I hope to be a part of it but I know its going to take a lot of learning. Right now neuroscience is limited to actual neurological disorders and hospital support in that a neurologist can protect a surgeon from making a mistake during surgery by watching a monitor that will tell if a surgeon is touching nerves that he shouldn't. This is obviously important for spinal surgery and other related operations. Neuroscience however has the potential though to become an overlapping field of being the center for diagnosis for a countless amount of troubles. The question is, how do we get the brain to help us? That is what I hope to help other researchers to figure out. And if they figure that out before I'm out of school, then I'll be right there helping people get those diagnosis'.

Lessons I've Learned At College

1. Sleep is one of the greatest gifts given by God.

2. Do your Homework!

3. Freshman may not always be the most immature people on campus.

4. TV and Video games are an absolute waste of time.

5. Never sit across a table from a bf/gf couple in the library, focusing on homework is impossible.

6. Modest really IS hottest

7. Karma has some legitimacy to it.

8. Scripture study is a MUST. For every day of secular learning, spiritual learning should accompany it.

9. Never wait to get warts treated, the longer you wait, the more painful the removal process.

10. Find the smart people and make them your friends

11. Ask questions!

12. Eating cheap saves money, but it also takes a toll on your body. Eat for nutrition!

13. People are generally good, if you find the bad ones, then that just makes the good people gooder.

14. Naps are a GREAT idea

15. Timing is extremely important, but patience is also a smart move.

16. Nasal sprays are ridiculously relieving

17. Mom's know EVERYTHING

18.

Who's right? Or is it everyone?

Last night as I made my usual trip to the library (my new second home) I was caught away in thought like normal. I was late to my normal study time which usually begins about 4:00 but because of some errands I had to run I didn't get to the library until about 6:00 or so. More people were walking campus than normal, I assume because they were heading back home where they would go to FHE (which I know I should have been going to but we don't happen to have a working FHE group at the moment so its kind of lame). As I passed by all of these people I couldnt help but listen in on some of the conversations going on. I found it interesting and worth pondering the frequent times I heard one person giving counsel to another or simply expressing their view on a topic. In other words, opinions were flying everywhere. What an opinionated world we live in! Opinions are great I believe, kind of funny at times in fact. For some reason though as I passed by the last group of opinionated persons this thought and/or question came into my head. "I wonder if all the opinions in the world were compiled and combined into one archival record, truth would be established." Yeah it's kind of a long shot but this is how I substantiated that in my head. For every persons opinion there is (allowing the benefit of the doubt for some of those that are quite "off" we might say) some degree, even if slight, of truth about the view expressed. Truth I guess in this sense would be defined as something that could be established as a fact of an actual occurance, reason, knowledge, etc. So the theory in my head is, if all parts of those truths are combined, do they make a whole? Or do they simply find themselves still drowned out in the non-truths? My mind kind of exploded when I tried to imagine how many opinions must be given in a single day. One of these days I want to see if I can keep track of how many times I offer my opinion in a day. It may not be highly accurate of a recording though I assume because I wouldnt consider myself a highly opinionated person. I may have my opinions but I guess I mean that I don't regularly share them freely. Anyway, I think that would be interesting to find that # and then multiply it by the 6.5 Billion people that live on this earth. That would just be one days worth! So with all of this opinion and wise advice/counsel from our friends and acquaintances, wouldn't it be great if we could take the truth out of it all and place it into one great whole? This is obviously the reality of a supreme being. This is the evidence of the wisdom of the Godhead and the use of the Holy Ghost who is a container of all that wisdom and imparts that to mankind.

Though it seems libraries do a great job of containing all of that knowledge and information that we as human beings seem to stumble upon and record, it's really hard to even call it a fraction of what knowledge has passed from the entirety of the lips of mankind. And then we must even realize and consider the evolution of the knowledge contained in these libraries. They are a storage of a knowledge that is still passing through the filter. Opinion and human interjections are being sifted out and truth and knowledge are being pulled together into bound covers. I can only imagine the feeling that we will all have when we reach the Kingdom of God and compare the knowledge that we had here and the knowledge of God. It may be slightly depressing for a moment for how far we still were in comparison and yet that depression would simply be replaced with relief I think, at least in my heart it would. Finally truth could be held and not tainted.

I tried imagining this thought in a pictorial and visual form before writing this blog but I realized how complex that picture would become as well. I imagined at first a number, say 15-20 circles that all form a circle themselves by their positioning. Each of them overlap the circles next to them since opinions always seem to contain many of the same elements as other opinions and thus overlap. Then I saw overlap in the very center by all of the circles creating a sort of "truth" zone where it all comes down to a point of reality. It all made sense in my head until I realized how variable those outer circles really were. Each circle will have a variable amount of truth to it, a variable amount of information contained, etc. In reality its almost as if each circle should be drawn in different sizes and colors and so on. There is no generalized form of opinion that can be dissected to see just the opinion and the truth in the same amounts every time. So, that visual was quickly destroyed haha. Nonetheless, there must be some sort of central circle that we all wish we could drink from so to speak. That central circle is the container of some of the greatest possessions known to man. Those possessions are known as knowledge. Ah to drink from pure knowledge.... that must be why listening and following the Holy Ghost must feel so good. It is pure knowledge flowing.

And this kids has been yet another trip into the mind of the Duck

Update 3/27/10

Yesterday I began to have a bit of a further exploration and realization of more thoughts concerning this topic. I think this is the best sort of thing when you are able to recognize your own flaws and build off of them. This would be one of those cases. Although the general thought of the central entry is interesting to ponder about, I realized that I had made an important oversight. It is quite interesting to see how any and all opinions overlap and where we can cross them to come to truth, but I realized that I had made a very silly assumption that opinions and thoughts are stable and/or unchanging. For the reader, this now seems quite obvious I'd hope about how stupid I was to walk right past that observation. For the main entry to be legitimate, every person would have to maintain their opinions and simply acquire them in one instance. In other words, you would either have one opinion or none at all. But that is not how things really are obviously. All of us experience opinion changes and truth findings every single day. Being in college at the moment, I most definitely experience it on a regular basis. I just heard a statement yesterday about an effect the government has had on BYU and some policies and therefore my opinion on the government has been altered to a degree, therefore changing what amount of truth per-say I first obtained.

To make this once again visual I compared it in thoughts yesterday to something we'd been learning in Chemistry lately with gas properties. Gases are made up of many tiny tiny particles all moving at various speeds and directions. Out of random order certain particles pump into others and therefore transfer kinetic energy or lose kinetic energy. In essence, due to the large number of particles, there are transfers in energy on a regular basis. We can conclude that with great probability, not one particle will remain in its exact same conditions for very long if it is contained in a certain limited volume. Just the same with our opinions, with all the other ideas and thoughts floating around, its extremely probably that our own opinions and thoughts will bounce off others and therefore transfer energy and change the properties of our opinions. In the chemistry scenario however, there is still a general and regular graph of the amount of interactions that is quite predictable. The wonder then becomes that if this is what happens with gas particles, can our ratios of opinions vs truths also be "graphed" or summed up in a sense? This is what I have recently been pondering over and I'm not sure if an answer could be gathered for that question due to its magnitude of necessary information.

Im sure there will be more things that I will realize that I am missing that alter the ratio of opinions to truth, but this is what I have for the moment. I can't quite decide if this new thought adds complication to the understanding of truth versus opinion, or if it actually refines it farther. More pondering shall continue.

The Choosiest Chooser

It's amazing how quickly our lives point us towards the plan of salvation as shown to us by our Heavenly Father. For those who know this plan, it seems that no matter how distracted we get from other events in life, that same path still becomes our direction. I've noticed this lately as it's felt like since I got here to BYU that my life has still been a bit wandersome. I feel like I have something nailed down and then its shaken up again just a bit so that I have to readjust once more.

I found myself the other day being quite unstable in my ability to just focus on my path ahead of me and instead was looking around at anything that was around me as I walked to the school. I was reading everything and analyzing every detail of my surroundings. I eventually noticed I was doing this and asked myself what I was looking for. The answer? A sign. I thought about the tendency I was having to look for any sort of direction marker for my life. Even a license plate with a few key letters would stick out to me and I would wonder if it was significant. In not too long I realize how silly this was. When God designed His plan, He didn't create it so that as we go through life we're supposed to be on a scavenger hunt for his clues and map points. That would be silly and contrary to our purpose on this life. Although He is known for intervening at times when our paths are on a collision course with great sorrow, I believe now that He really does want us to learn to make our own choices and really be GOOD at doing so. We need to know how to make choices that bring about the best results/consequences and judge righteously from right and wrong. It's difficult, especially for me it seems, since we have such an Earthly view and can only see a few hundred meters into our future it feels like. But that view must expand and lengthen as we obtain a greater spirit and a greater faith.

I've told a couple friends now of the difference in view I noticed between when I was on the mission and when I returned home. While a missionary I was living a life that was directed wholly by the spirit. The work could not be performed or at least successful without that sort of companionship. Thankfully I felt like I acquired that to a sufficient amount to bring about great works. While in this companionship with the spirit, it truly felt like I could see above and beyond the heads of those around me. It was like I was standing on stilts and could see more and farther. When I spoke to those who were attempting to make choices of significance I felt that spirit fill me and expand my vision enough that I could righteously give counsel to those who could not see as far. I knew the consequences of some peoples actions before they chose them. I knew I could promise them certain outcomes. When I returned home from the mission and began making choices for my own life, it felt like I had fallen back down to earth and was no longer on those stilts. There must be no exceptions for any individual in this plan. We all have to learn to choose for ourselves and become good choosers as we do so. Though the spirit and the Gospel give a good compass reading so to speak, we still have to take the journey through the dark and dreary world holding onto that rod of iron.

So far its felt like I've made relatively good choices, but it still feels like I'm living from choice to choice and I'm looking for that directional sign to get me going in a comfortable path. That sign may never come though and so I plan on being a better chooser every day. The best way to do that I'm guessing is to keep the spirit close through whatever means I need to. That is my plan and that is my latest choice I guess. Just from past experience I think I can already say I'm going to be just fine with that path.

A Rolemodel

I recently finished reading the book Distant Vision by Elma G . Farnsworth, wife of Philo T. Farnsworth a few weeks ago. It was a great book, I recommend it to anyone who is looking for an awesome biography. I got the book from Linda Farnsworth, the wife of Philo and Elma's youngest son Kent. I did service for the family on the mission and enjoyed every minute of it. The family itself was having a very very hard time and probably still is, but nonetheless I was able to learn a lot while I was there. My reason for bringing that up is the comparison that I now have with Philo's life and my own. They're quite different believe me, I mean, the guy came up with his ideas for the invention of television at age 15. He's definitely got me beat by a few years. What I learned in Distant Vision though is that Philo received much of his early education here at BYU where I attend. It's interesting to ponder the reality that such great minds walked the same walkways and studied in the same manner as I do now. Philo returned to BYU at the end of his career to hopefully finish his project on fusion but he died before he could complete it. Thats where the biography gets intense because Philo had fusion worked out, he just didnt have the funding or belief of all other elevated scientists around. Since he feared that others would try and steal his patents like people had tried before, he didn't record his findings like he previously had and therefore when he died, everything went with him. Kind of a bummer, but man is it amazing to think that an original BYU student almost changed everything about our lives. Fusion power would have affected almost every aspect of our lives.

I guess its thinking about role-models like these that keep me interested in even going back to the library every day to study. I get a feeling as I walk up to the doors that I know I'm going to be sitting here at one of the study tables stuck until I feel like I've reached a point of productivity that is going to be satisfactory for either the next day or the next week. It many times is a dreading feeling as I approach those doors but other times it may feel like a more noble feeling in being proud of my decision to be here and training my mind for great things like Philo T. Farnsworth.

Seeing the thousands of students around me at times feels daunting due to realization that this world is going to be filled with competition for the rest of my life. That means I can't just slow down or give myself all the time in the world to come up with my plans or work. I'm not planning on slowing down but its never an exciting feeling to think about the major loss of sleep that will continue to follow me through these following years. It'll all be worth it in the end though.

One more place of relation between Philo and I seemed to be a need for a companion. I'm not saying this to infer that I'm on the lookout to get married ASAP but there is so much that comes with having a companion to accompany you throughout life. My patriarchal blessing says that my future spouse will enhance all that I desire to do. How great is that! For Philo's case, Elma was very much that spouse that was going to enhance all that he did. He was a very lucky man to find the woman that he did. She was patient with the time he needed to spend on his inventions and the many risks that he took that at times completely devastated their family for a time. They were a team and that is what I hope to experience one day. I can almost feel the potential difference already that awaits me when I will have the opportunity to see the change when I have that companion.

Time to hit the books again, on to becoming something great.

I Can't But I Can Believe I Started This

Some of those close to me in life would not be surprised to find me finally creating a blog I think but at the same time I think it seems to be a little bit of an evidence to myself that I really haven't changed much over the years. I guess sometimes you just have to accept who you are and embrace it in a good degree. I've always enjoyed expressing my feelings in writing but have never been a great writer. That's never felt like a problem to me but I think it would always be nice to be able to express myself a little more fluently. Nonetheless I still can't help but express myself in this way some how. I have a much harder time trying to do that expression in person or simply in a verbal method and so this is what I resort to I guess.

Right now as a somewhat new college student and a man with goals of bringing together a family of my own eventually, I feel like I will definitely have some interesting experiences ahead of me. For the quickest update I'll say that I'm attending Brigham Young University in Provo, Utah and currently living in an apartment with 4 roommates, all great guys. I was recently broken from a dating relationship with a girl named Courtney, but the choice was mutual. Many of my long-time friends are very much scattered around and because of that I'm placed in a position of trying to find more and new ones that are a lot closer. That's not exactly an easy thing for me but I feel like I'm doing well so far. I am studying Neuroscience at the university and have a long way to go before I fulfill that goal.

My family is mostly all back in Washington except for a few who span across the U.S. I have a twin brother who hopefully will be joining me here at BYU in August which will make the experience here even more enjoyable I'm sure. I'm not exactly sure what all of my future plans are at the moment and I'm really feeling like I'm living life day by day. I'm not used to living that way but I guess I'm going to have to get used to it.

I guess that's me in a nut shell right now. Hopefully as this blog progresses plans will start to form in my life and I'll actually appear like I know what I'm doing. If not, then I guess that's life. At least something like this blog can be my way of releasing a lot of the inner thoughts in my mind. I think too much and can't help but get it out eventually. Considering I such at verbalizing my thoughts, here I am.